When you're cooking something, and your smoke detectors go off, take the food off the heat before you go to stop them wailing, even if the noise is doing your head in...

Before you help someone - especially by intervening if you see them being bullied - think about whether you matter less (to that particular social environment) than either the bully or the victim. Otherwise, all the do-as-you-would-be-done-by and compassion in the world will just leave everyone else feeling insulted that you thought you had the right to say anything to them (the bully) and the victim will feel hurt, belittled and offended that anyone might think they need help from someone so inferior as you. If you do make this mistake, think yourself lucky if you get away with a mere frosty silence.

Oh dear, nervouswriter, that sounds a horrible situation - at least you have the comfort of knowing that you meant to do the right and brave thing even if it was thrown back in your face.

Oh dear, it's horrible when you try to help and it gets thrown back in your face. As Lizco said, at least you know that you were trying to do the right thing.

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We really must stop eating like this ...

Minds are like parachutes - they only function when open.

http://setinthepast.wordpress.com/

I'm so sorry you experinced that nervouswriter but don't stop trying to do the right thing. I really wish I'd known someone like you when I was working and being bullied and my utterly useless, incompetent line manager just turned a blind eye to it.

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http://www.timwoodward.weebly.com

Thank you. It's not a recent situation so I don't feel I deserve any sympathy, but I came across the writing related to it again this morning and am kicking myself all over again. I'm sure I wasn't any help in the long run, since I couldn't do more than say to the bully "that's not the way to behave" and "get some help if the bullying is a reflection of your personal issues" and admire the work the victim was producing. I was speaking from a position of inferior power to both individuals - and will check in future that that isn't the case! Luckily I don't think I've done the victim any harm, apart from possibly making her feel bad. Possibly I've been helpful to the bully.
(I can understand that saying "thank you" where anyone else could hear might lower her stock with others. She could have said something privately but hasn't, so sadly hurt or offence seem her two most likely feelings.)

Possibly those that "walk by on the other side" have had similar situations in the past. I'd be far more wary of intervening without being directly asked to in future, I think, although I'm a rather slow learner in these things.

Do not stick your tongue out at the cat, for the cat will then put her nose on your tongue.

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"And I'm sure there was blood in the gutter from somebody's head, or else it was the sunset in a puddle."

That is so sweet

Before running round in panic at the strange crusted rash on your face, put on your glasses, and check it isn't coffee powder.

<loud gurgle of laughter>

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Someone cooking meat at the den of the fox said, "We do not mention this in front of the mongoose." Sumerian proverb

Outskirts Of The Twenties: Polari

Non-CS fic: Late Back (Good Omens)

giggles here

Always concentrate when moving Aga shelves. Fortunately I managed to catch the one that just almost slipped out of my hands, but my bare legs would not have been happy if I hadn't!

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"In the absence of knowledge, it is easier to judge than to understand."
James Axtell, 'Moral Reflections on Columbus'

Permanent marker pens.
White-board marker pens.

Similar, yet different.

LOL! Yes, very different, although one of them is a lot of fun to plant in a place where a suspected klepto will steal it and unquestioningly use it!

When going to hospital for a blood test always ensure you have the vital piece of paper with you and not at home on the sofa

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Visit http://www.encorebooks.co.uk and http://stores.ebay.co.uk/encorebooks for a wide selection of secondhand and new children's books (including ones published by GGBP, Bettany Press, Greyladies, The EJO Society, Books to Treasure and Fidra Books)

[quote="Jayne"]Permanent marker pens.
White-board marker pens.

Similar, yet different.

[/quote]


Ooops

If you have used the permanent instead of whiteboard write over it with the whiteboard one and wipe off quick - that usually removes it.

Never ever buy a fridge freezer with any kind of alarm - as when it malfunctions it will beep roughly every 5 minutes for days with no obvious cause or way to stop it...aaargh!!

When doing a load of washing, check the cycle has actually started before sitting down to a couple of hours in front of the TV, then when you go back and see the green light winking, don't assume it has finished and unload the lot before it dawns on you that everything is remarkably dry!

Sorry but

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Cestina's dolls houses - "But there's never a rose like you..."